Can you tell if and when a man has ejaculated? Well, some women love to take control of the sex and movements entirely.
Being aware of your partner’s ejaculation, whenever it happens, has the potential to be life-changing. It brings more control, pleasure, connection, presence, and intimacy.
So how do you know if he has ejaculated and you need to stop going? Well, if he is wearing a condom, you may not feel him ejaculate.
Otherwise, you may find yourself in a situation where you keep going without realizing he has come but has not said anything. This could be pretty embarrassing.
So the elephant in the room is: Can you tell?
How does a man ejaculate?
When a man ejaculates, he releases a sticky liquid out of his penis. In non-penetrative sex, it is easy to see the semen and tell that he has ejaculated.
However, when it comes to vaginal sex, it is hard to tell whether he has ejaculated. If he is using a condom, you can see that the semen collects inside the condom.
Different men have different ejaculation spans; some come too soon while others take longer to come. Preemptively, understanding your man is vital.
Nevertheless, the easiest way out, and the one that works right away is just to ask.
If you want to be sure, ask
The easiest way to clear any doubts, on the release matters, is to ask your partner. Talking about ejaculation takes the mystery out of it.
It is amazing what happens when we put words to our sexual needs and let someone else hear them. It still feels embarrassing, of course, to be that vulnerable.
Worry not; communication about sex should take place – before, during and after sex. This helps both of you to understand your intimate preferences, which makes sex better.
Moreover, the best way to strengthen communication in your relationship is to initiate talks that are more or less sexual.
This involves taking baby steps to ask about sex and have them tell you some distinct details about how they experience sex.
Signs that he came
These are some common signs that occur that can inform you of your partner’s ejaculation. These signs are not universal for every man; hence, they may not always apply. Nevertheless, some of the telltale signs are:
- The erection will go down: After ejaculation, all the blood that had rushed to his penis will return to various body parts, making the penis shrink.
- Distinct sexual noise: Some men may make certain noises or gasps. He may exude a certain body language, mutter something or give audible clue. He will exhibit certain facial expressions or simply stop thrusting. Better yet, in your sex communication session, you may ask him to give you some sort of sign when he comes.
- Sometimes, your partner may get really sensitive once he ejaculates. In most cases, he will probably tell you that he is done.
- A tickling sensation: Prior to ejaculation, your partner will experience a ticklish feeling. The man may experience some mild form of tremors with burning sensation whereby he shivers.
- As he ejaculates, the testicles and scrotum rise up near the body. If you are keen enough, you may notice this.
- Change in breathing: Your partner may start breathing oddly or his heartbeat rate suddenly increases.
- He may experience sudden tension in his body. He may hold you tightly to slow the sexual activity down.
- Pre-ejaculation occurs: In this instant, your partner releases a small amount of sticky liquid from his urethra.
- Does your partner snore? This would be the best audible cue that he came and has fallen asleep.
Some of this signs may not be noticeable, but the more you engage in intercourse with your partner, you get to know their bodily behavior during intercourse.
Good sexual partners learn to control themselves until both of you have had pleasure. It may not be simultaneous, but whoever gets the orgasm first must learn to pleasure the other partner until they both reach orgasm.
Though it is a tricky thing to balance, with time, everyone gets the mojo.
I cannot feel the ejaculate
Relax, the semen released is relatively small, it is a teaspoon amount. The semen is released with less force that you may not feel.
Some women may feel it but it is normal if you cannot feel the release. In retrospect, there is absolutely nothing abnormal about your partner if you cannot tell it.
Sometimes the ejaculation may throb a bit, but mostly there is nothing much to indicate what is going on down there.
What is the pre-ejaculate?
Although these liquids come from a different part of a man’s body at a different time, pre-ejaculate and ejaculate is the same thing.
Pre-ejaculate cleans the man’s urethra and provides lubrication. It also indicates that your partner is already turned on.
If you are stroking your partner’s penis and some pre-ejaculate come out, it is a good sign that he is aroused. Your efforts are working!
While we are still on this topic, it is important to remember condoms are great for protection against pregnancy and STDs.
If you have been sexually active for more than six months, you should get two clear STI scans. We always suggest that you use a condom to prevent genital and fluid contact.
The bottom line
There is a huge big difference in sensation during sex and coming inside a woman without a condom. When a woman is sexually active but is avoiding pregnancy, it is important for her to know when her partner is about to ejaculate.
Remember, though raw sex feels really good, protected sex is better than no sex at all. In the end, a condom is also more affordable than child support.
Always remember, there is nothing wrong with asking your partner if he came inside you. If you are anxious about it, just ask.